Overwrought is My Way, Dispirited is My Path

Can any one understand the darkness inside

Will any one know the shadows I hide from

The fears so deeply ingrained by times passing

Can the wounds ever be healed

Will the scars ever fade from sight

The terrors may remain for all my life

Can any one know the shame of being powerless in my own mind

Will any one really ever care that I don’t know how to survive

The will to thrive is barely even there inside

This is the life I live each and every day

This is not the choice I want to breath

This is all I am in these shattered seconds

This may be harder to live to the next moment

This is not easy to explain to the unbroken


Now is Not to Late

Life is to short to wait, to think that there will be a tomorrow,

But right now, it isn’t to late.

There is never enough hours in the day to keep up with the daily needs,

But right now, you have the time.

Life is to short to be wasted on trivial matters,

But right now, you can make a change.

Don’t make mistakes, unless you are willing to learn from them,

So right now, learn, change, grow.

Going through life living only in the pain, don’t waste the joy,

So right now, live in love.

Be set free from the burnt and broken life,

Fly willingly into an open sky,

Let us dance to a tune hope and life.

Now is the the time to make life a place worth living,

Live now.

It wasn’t you, it wasn’t them, but I who got me there

You know it wasn’t you who I can blame in aiding me
even if you put me through this shame
made me take this journey in order to find my way
but it wasn’t you who decided to take this way

It wasn’t you beside me as I limped down the path before me
I was all alone
no word of love or hope I heard near me
No it most definitely wasn’t you who I trusted to help me here

It wasn’t you who shared my blood down many lines
no character to support this body falling apart
this loving feeling was just a fable
far from any truth
of course it wasn’t you of lineage who laid claim here

No one out the past or present or even future
dared take hold of my fleeting soul
all ran away
nothing did you have to say
my hope was in none of you

Me, myself, but more so my beloved
that is were the shifting came
form the spirits glowing
ever knowing
lead to this place of light and love
they shared with me a journey
and experience of my soul
spirited away to safely be
no a healing journey they lead me

Different is the home I reside within today
different from the house of yesterday

Much deeper is the heart residing beneath my breast
true love beats with in my chest
No made by those I’ve seen
Or of foots steps walking all over me

Tis true my wounds were beyond belief
so deep and brutally real
will never change the actual compassion my spirit is meant to be

Emoting Suppression

Writing lyrically when I feel joy is a hard trait to attain,
Poetry in sorrow is what I have learned best,
The emotion that was not so easy to suppress,
Couldn’t hide from myself all the way
I tried, so hard, so often
Like it wasn’t me, it was a bad dream, a haunted fantasy,
The corruption I felt,
The longing within me, to be set free,
The will I was losing as each day ran by,
My heart couldn’t take it,
I wanted out of my skin, no matter what it took,
What love was to me was a broken spirit,
A person who could give to others but not have anything left for me,
People taking, I wanted to help, I wanted to give,
But I wanted to feel what any person who is alive at some point does
I wanted to be truly needed, for what I was ,
Not what I wasn’t,
I wanted to be loved so deeply we forgot we were separate at times,
Loved without having to have reason,
With no conditions to sign for me to get it in return,
I didn’t know how to write what I had not experienced,
How can you bring words to life when you are dead,
There is no dream in the sadness of brutality,
Now I am alive, so now I will learn,
Learn to type out the joy my heart feels,
The feelings you have given me hope to be in,
Love that I was beginning to believe didn’t exist.