Wanderlust to Freedom

To wander through the lands and find to where my heart belongs,

Break free from shackles that have held tight from so long ago

Heart, soul, spirit, body all that is my being an more

Then whence had not one but all of these hid away never to be seen

My soul feels broken from all the shameful, bitter days

Each moment held below the surface deep, unable tot take breath

What shelter may I find in the beauty of the world surrounding me

No longer to linger in the wastes of yesterdays battles

A light will lead me forward into a brighter beyond

Shall we feel the hope that was once cut from my being

I find that even in my deplitated state I strive for something more

So now I wish to journey with no destination but the trail I shall walk


When Facing Darkness Today

Have you ever stood at the edge

Ready to jump

Spring out of fear into darkness

Staring into the abyss

From having just come back

After having looked into it


A sharp knowledge within

Facing death

He was always so close by

I am a wreck to admit

Him I do miss

The shadows I fear

Always fear

Will it be fading

The sorrow eating at me

It is sad to know

I still have this dream

To fade away

From this reality

Such a strong pull

Trying to will me to

Taking me back

Into the arms of blackness


To the bleakness

Please dear Love

Hope do sing

Hold me tighter

Do not let it take me

I won’t break again

I want joy

To live in love

All surrounding

I need to live

And dream of brighter days

I really don’t

Want to fade today

Like water on stone

Washed away

Be my anchor hold

Keep me close

To suffer through

Make it brighter

My load much lighter

This burden I bear

To you try to release

Let me be free

Where the Pain could take me

If I would have known my future

I would have asked to not be born

Beg to be aborted

I know that sounds sick

Maybe a little demented

Life has twisted my perception of it

At least that is how I could feel

The way my thoughts try to wander

But in truth

Life is precious and dear

I have been given so much

Even through the raving storms

Inches upon inches of rain

When I look back at all the pain

I wonder how I made it

I try to stay away

Without running far in the other direction

Stay in the present

Be in this place right here

Trauma and ranges of fear haunt me

Living is a hard feet to accomplish

Each day a trial

But I wake up

I get up and move

My voice is weak to this day

Barely audible above life’s static

I am here

Depending on something greater

To more than get me by

I hope one day I will live more

Living to thrive

That is what I believe

On the other side of it all

No more

Only brighter

Live life lighter Today

For that is all I really have

What In The World

This world has little to offer me

These thoughts has been breeding deeply

Within me I feel this truth

There are many tempting things

Materialism is running rampant

Always wanting what we think we need

I do give in way to often

The next best technology teaching me

A great sweater warming while fashionable

I am however trying to not be influenced

Not by what is the latest hot topic

I fall victim to the desires growing by my need to express

Who am I and what does that mean

How can I show what that is

I have begun to realize that fact

Buying things that reflect the inner you is a way

But there are far better

More simple yet profoundly freeing

In all the fury of the past storms

I have realized less is so much more

Less to cling to holding you down

Where in this world do I belong

Slowly with each passing moment I know

I do not belong to this world

And in reality I really do not want to

Anything beautiful and great about it

Was given to it by it’s creator

Everything else is just not worth it


One Art

Everything you see,

All reflecting me

Showing you bits and pieces

The entirety of what makes me

Drawn with delicate hands

Marred by bitter times

Written in dark thoughts

But hope was always an underline

Sad filled dreams

Never a light to be seen

Highly crafted sculptor

Made of finely filtered material

Created from immense pressure

Unknown conditions

One Art

By one Soul

All of my Heart

This is me

I am way more than what you see

Truly Priceless

Now is Not to Late

Life is to short to wait, to think that there will be a tomorrow,

But right now, it isn’t to late.

There is never enough hours in the day to keep up with the daily needs,

But right now, you have the time.

Life is to short to be wasted on trivial matters,

But right now, you can make a change.

Don’t make mistakes, unless you are willing to learn from them,

So right now, learn, change, grow.

Going through life living only in the pain, don’t waste the joy,

So right now, live in love.

Be set free from the burnt and broken life,

Fly willingly into an open sky,

Let us dance to a tune hope and life.

Now is the the time to make life a place worth living,

Live now.

Truly Taking Flight

I never knew that I was able to take flight,

I never understood the sky could be the limit,

That in reality my flight could be limitless.

Freedom beyond anything I knew

Trapped under years of lies piling high.

What was I doing dying all those days past?

Why was I so afraid to spread my wings?

Lingering words form so many lips,

Hurtful things that grounded me for life.

I believed that I was never meant for height,

No, not I.

I was nothing.

I belonged to the dirt,

The grime.

Barely crawling through the pain.

I never dared look at the sky.

Now there is no looking back.

No one can stop me from soaring without shame.

This is my life to be,

To  hope,

To see.

Dance with the wind and leaves.

Cloud prancer.

This is the new me,

The person I was always meant to live.

And that is not the end.

Every End is a Beginning

Every Sunset will become a Sunrise

Any last page, a closed book

Gives a chance for new one to be read

Every dark and shadow filled night

Breaks way for a brand new day

Start over after every try

Don’t give up and think it is over

When that one song ends a new one begins

A fresh start around every failure

Something we think will end us

Can send us to something different

Keep fighting, keep it up

When the curtain falls on this play

A fresh recital starts soon after

Keep dancing and singing and playing the part

For as long as we breath

We can and will began again

Life Review, preview

Look back,

Looks like an Epic tragedy


With nothing to prove

Because who would see

What was

Who would hear truth

Who knows

My life

How sad



Or so I think so often

But why

What is life’s purpose


And what does that mean

Every definition is different

We are all


So I am in discovery


It will all be new

and old

But it will be me

Done with yesterday

Why wait for tomorrow

I’m here today

So life was a downer


No where

That was it

Or so it seemed

From that past

I push for a future

With Him

It is

Is all

Traveling Through Darkness

I once believed in a story filled with pain. No happy ending could be claimed. Surrounded in sadness, all consuming. Broken was her name, eternally shamed. No hope in sight, nothing near joy could be found. Why fight a seemingly losing battle, a fight with only wounds. Nothing but darkness to see, no light in my presence. Or so that is what I was to believe, that is what I had seen. Life was meaningless, faith was useless as hoping. And that is what I would be, finding a reason for living was fading. Each breath was a waste of time, for me living was a crime. Distancing myself from everything living, fade away into shadows. Why keep it up if to hurt is all there is, is that all it means? And so I had felt, It is the way I truly believed. My life was nothing but death, even int he depths of my dreams. But today I stand a changed being, broken yet whole. Pieces shattered about, parts were stolen away. I will survive and live and thrive to be alive. I have found hope, that I thought couldn’t be there. A light in the darkest of places shown brightly through. Today I live a life in love, my story is true. To surrender to the unhappy places, an unending curse. There is such a thing as life after terror, I am there I say. Hard it was to battle, to be a being of this bright land. Even in the darkness I stand firm on this ground, knowing the storm will pass. So take heart all you weak from your battles, or weathered and worn. There is that light at the end, I know, I have traveled it long.